im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize