come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
