OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
