I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
