Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
