Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
