And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
