i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
