Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
