Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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