he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
