He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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