Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize