I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Your dad touched me again.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
