why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
