How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
