the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Just took my morning after pill in the library
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
