I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
