I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
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