I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
