this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I just googled if crying burns calories
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
