bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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