It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
