Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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