So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize
