she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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