I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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