So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
