I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize