I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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