That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
