i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
