there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Is it because I queefed?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
