Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
