i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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