What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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