Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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