No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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