I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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