Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
