My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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