My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
