I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
