so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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