i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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