i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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