Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Randomize
