I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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