I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
