can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
