he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
